I have a confession to make: I don’t dance. I don’t know how — that whole “just move your body, feel the music” thing always infuriated me because I just don’t get it — and I don’t like it. I feel so self-conscious. Dance parties literally terrify me. The worst part is that the dance parties are often such a central part of the queer party scene — in a more organized sense (Chicago has Chances Dances weekly, Queerer Park and FKA monthly, and Berlin all the time, just to name a few) and in the “and then it devolves into a dance party” sense. And that’s not who I am. Continue reading
Dan Savage got glitterbombed for being transphobic: it’s all over (my) Facebook. For the most part, I think that’s great. He’s said a lot of transphobic things, and to my knowledge, he’s never truly apologized or shown that he realizes why they was problematic and hurtful. I know: I called him on it when he spoke at Bryn Mawr my senior year, and he basically side-stepped the question.
Well, it’s National Coming Out Day again (or so Facebook tells me), and a lot has happened in the past year. Most particularly, I’m now out as trans — I wasn’t quite ready to do that yet last year. In terms of coming out/transitioning, it’s been a big year. One of the best things is that I now actually have language for myself and words that feel comfortable to me. Continue reading
This whole “us versus them” mentality really gets us nowhere.
I understand the desire — the need — to have community and to not always be the “other,” the “them.” (RENT, anyone? “To being an ‘us’ for once / instead of a ‘them!’”) As someone who has been part of a “them” for as long as I can remember, I get that.
At the same time, I think we often tend to go too far with the “us versus them” mentality. Continue reading
EXPLORING TRANS – SATURDAY, JULY 10, 2010, 8:11 PM
I feel like I’m being pulled in so many different directions. I don’t know how — I’ve never know how — to deal with multiple identities in a way that didn’t cause one of them to be neglected and ignored. I’m a Korean adoptee, but I’m also queer and trans, and I haven’t yet been able to figure out a way to unite those identities, instead of simply pushing one to the foreground and the other to the back. Continue reading
Posted in Exploring Trans, Trans/Queer
Tagged adoptee, childhood, confusion, Exploring Trans, gender, high school, identity, Korean, Korean dance, loneliness, nonconformity, postaday2011, queer, theatre, trans, transgender
EXPLORING TRANS – FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2010, 1:21 AM
I’m probably never going to meet any of the people who were in my life before I met my parents, before I came to the U.S. It’s something I’m working to accept. Oh, I might be able to track them down — unlike some of my friends, I was one of the lucky ones. I have the names and cities of my birth parents, and the agency through which I was adopted still exists. And part of me really wants to find them, part of me really wants to meet people who are actually biologically related to me. Part of me wants to know whether I look like them, whether I inherited any of their traits or skills. Part of me wants to know — know for sure, know for certain — whether they loved me. Did they give me up because they didn’t want me, or because they wanted a better life for me? Continue reading
Posted in Exploring Trans, Trans/Queer
Tagged adoptee, biology, birth parents, coming out, family, Korea, queer, trans, transgender, travel
EXPLORING TRANS – THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 16, 2010, 4:19 AM
No, I’m not referring to the TV show. I’m actually talking about a group I recently joined here, Genderqueer Chicago. I’ve only been to two meetings, but it is changing my life. I know that sounds incredibly hyperbolic and melodramatic, but I’m actually serious. Continue reading
Posted in Chicago, Exploring Trans, Trans/Queer
Tagged Chicago, community, Exploring Trans, friends, gender, genderqueer, Genderqueer Chicago, postaday2011, queer, recognition, trans, transgender
A while back, I came across an article online from Vanity Fair regarding a then-recent episode of Glee. Brett Berk, the writer — an openly gay man who uses the term “faggy” to refer to himself – uses the term “fags” in a relatively innocuous way, referring to the Dalton Warblers of Glee, and it created an immediate uproar. Frankly, though, all of the ’no one should ever use that horrible word, and he should be fired!’ people upset me more than his use of the word did. Continue reading