Tag Archives: gay

National Coming Out Day Once Again

Well, it’s National Coming Out Day again (or so Facebook tells me), and a lot has happened in the past year. Most particularly, I’m now out as trans — I wasn’t quite ready to do that yet last year. In terms of coming out/transitioning, it’s been a big year. One of the best things is that I now actually have language for myself and words that feel comfortable to me.  Continue reading

Something I’ve Never Told Anyone

Write about one thing you’ve never told anyone and explain why

This sounds odd, but I’m not actually certain what I’ve told people. There are, of course, a number of things I’ve kept under wraps, so to speak, but I’ve not really kept track of my secrets. I email certain people and just sort of unload everything in my mind at the time . . . pretty much without a filter. And then I don’t necessarily remember every single word of the tens or hundreds of thousands. But I’ve shared most of my secrets, whether they be related to gender, queerness, my worries, insecurities, fears of being forgotten. It’s difficult to think of something I’m certain I’ve never told anyone. And then if I can, it’s not necessarily something about which I want to blog — really, if I haven’t told the people I trust most, why would I tell the internet? Still, there’s one thing I’m willing to share that I’m pretty sure I’ve not yet told to anyone.  Continue reading

Fag

A while back, I came across an article online from Vanity Fair regarding a then-recent episode of Glee. Brett Berk, the writer — an openly gay man who uses the term “faggy” to refer to himself – uses the term “fags” in a relatively innocuous way, referring to the Dalton Warblers of Glee, and it created an immediate uproar. Frankly, though, all of the ‘no one should ever use that horrible word, and he should be fired!’ people upset me more than his use of the word did. Continue reading

What If Being Gay Is A Choice?

What if being gay is a choice? Of course, to even consider debating that, we’d need to decide what it meant to “be gay.” Having “homosexual desires,” acting on them, being out, identifying as gay? What about queers? To a certain extent, depending on the definition “being gay” could be a choice (and being queer even more so). If being gay means being out and not acting in a heteronormative way, then yes, being gay is a choice. However, being alive is a choice (continuing to eat, only crossing streets when cars aren’t coming at you, not outright killing oneself — all choices to stay alive). Continue reading

Culture Shock at Work: Leaving My Queer/Trans Bubble

I started my first day at a temp job today — in a random warehouse in small town, WI. It started horribly. The place was a mess and utterly disorganized, and we waited there for an hour because they weren’t ready for us, but that wasn’t my real problem. I felt so incredibly queer and weird and other, and not in a fabulous, affirming kind of way. Silence and a room full of mostly white, sort of rural, presumably straight and cis people. And then there I was, in my skinny corduroys and hot pink nail polish, with my short hair and brown skin and button-down over binder — not yet passing for male, and reading INCITE! Women of Color Against Violence’s The Revolution Will Not Be Funded in attempts to ignore the awkward silence and not feel so alone. Continue reading

Hot Wall: Neil Patrick Harris

Neil Patrick Harris

Oh, man, how I do love Neil Patrick Harris. I will be forever grateful to my senior year suitemate for introducing me to him (well, through Doogie Houser, M.D. and How I Met Your Mother). She would watch the episodes on her laptop, and I’d end up getting pulled in based solely on what I would overhear from across the room. Eventually, we just started watching the show together, starting with the first season. Continue reading

Hot Wall: John Barrowman

John Barrowman

John Barrowman, Captain Jack Harkness — both pretty freaking awesome. I first saw John Barrowman in Doctor Who, but I only really noticed him once I started watching Torchwood (I’m chalking it up to being utterly distracted by David Tennant in the later seasons and being in favor of Nine/Rose in the first). Continue reading